Friday, October 24, 2008

McCain Volunteer Mugged And Disfigured, Claims Attack Was Politically Motivated

A 20-year-old woman and McCain-Palin volunteer worker told police that she was mugged at an ATM in Pittsburgh last evening around 9 p.m. by an African-American assailant who proceeded to carve the letter "B" into her right cheek. The woman claims that after the mugging, the suspect became enraged by the sight of a John McCain bumper sticker on her car, prompting a savage barrage of punches and kicks which culminated in the disfiguring mark.

Both campaign released statements denouncing the act. Sarah Palin called the victim personally.

***UPDATE***: I didn't want to be the first to suggest this, but if Michelle Malkin is suprisingly willing to walk out on this ledge, perhaps I'll follow her from a distance, of course wearing the safety-line of "I'm probably off my rocker."

Malkin doubts the authenticity of this story and the victim's rendition of the circumstances surrouding the assault as she is already being fitted for stardom by the Drudge Report (thanks for playing, Joe the Plumber. Here is the McCain-Palin campaign game, home version, as a parting gift.).

Specifically (and this detail rubbed me the wrong way too), Malkin struggles with the fact that she refused medical treatment after reporting the incident to police.

One of Malkin's readers is most incredulous about the "B" being backwards on the victim's face, noting that if she applied the wound to herself in the mirror, it would appear correct in the reflection, but reversed on her cheek.

Then again, have we become too cynical? It's hard to strain out the genuine articles from the grifters in this polarized climate.

***UPDATE***: The Smoking Gun posts the Twitter page of alleged victim, Ashley Todd, before it went private two hours ago. Driving aimlessly through the wild streets of Pittsburgh at night in hopes of finding a Bank of America ATM to avoid a service fee? Hmmmmm. Foolish parsimony I guess. Almost unbelievable in my estimation.

***UPDATE****: More revelations about Ashley Todd, quickly becoming our generation's Hester Pyrnne. Some things don't add up and the police want to administer a polygraph. I'm still buying shares in the story's legitimacy at this point, but only to decrease my loss ratio if her dubious tale is vindicated. Hedging my bets here.

***UPDATE***: The scoffers gather kindling and rope to build the stake. Salient point: that's quite some penmanship you've got there, presumptively would-be attacker, for such a violent encounter. That's the neatest, um, backwards "B" I've ever seen chiseled on a face.


Criminal assault by skin-embossing now becoming endemic to this long-in-the-tooth election cycle and the modus operandi of political thugs with scores to settle?

Perhaps in retaliation for Ashley Todd's harrowing (tall) tale of victimization at the hands of a pro-Obama (imaginary) attacker, this morning in Miami Beach, Florida, another reported incident of epidermal sloganizing: Captain Thaddeus Harris filed a complaint with local police after rising from an afternoon slumber on the beach to find the word "DORK" branded into his chest.

The events surrounding the incident remain fuzzy. At 2 pm, Harris applied two forms of sun-tanning products - a sunblock with a high UPF to keep out those "nasty ultra-violet rays" coupled with a dark tanning oil to "give him that deep, golden brown." After reprimanding his assistant, one Lieutenant Proctor, for standing "in his sun," Mr. Harris drifted into a peaceful sleep lying on his back in the sizzling heat of South Beach. He awoke to find the disgusting word imprinted between his nipples.

Police believe the perpetrator applied a substantial amount of sunscreen in shape of letters to exact the disparaging sentiment on Mr. Harris's body. Police also believe the attack was politically motivated as Harris's close friend, a musical, 6'4" African-American, Sergeant Larvelle Jones, is a public supporter of Senator Barack Obama.

When pressed for further comment, Captain Harris responded, "PROCTOR!!!!! WHERE . . . IS . . . PROCTOR!!!!!"

***UPDATE***: Oh this is rich - Ashley Todd's story is "changing" ("becoming more craptastic" if you're on the left, "evolving" or "being clarified" if you're on the right). Her new take? She was unconscious during the attack and discovered her scarlet "B" only after she roused. Just a side note, no biggie, probably not worth mentioning, but allegedly the surveillance camera filming the ATM where the purported attack took place has no visual record of Ashley Todd making a withdrawal. Strangely, I'm sort of rooting for her now because theatrics like this can stick with you (Tawana Brawley called - she wants her melodrama back). Another tidbit - police administered a polygraph and are following up on a "number of inconsistencies."

***UPDATE***: This story is blogging-pirate's booty. Okay, how to paraphrase the statements of John Moody, executive vice president of Fox News, with respect to the developing Ashley Todd . . . um . . . "watershed event 11 days before the election." You know what - take it away, Mr. Moody. I cannot do justice to your hyperbole:


It had to happen.

Less than two weeks before we vote for a new president, a white woman says a black man attacked her, then scarred her face, and says there was a political motive for it.

Ashley Todd, a 20-year-old white volunteer for John McCain’s presidential campaign, says she was mugged at an ATM machine in Pittsburgh (my hometown) by a big black man. She further says he threw her down, then disfigured her by carving the letter “B” into her face with a sharp implement when he saw that she supported McCain, not Barack Obama.

Part of the appeal of, and the unspoken tension behind, Senator Obama’s campaign is his transformational status as the first African-American to win a major party’s presidential nomination.

That does not mean that he has erased the mutual distrust between black and white Americans, and this incident could become a watershed event in the 11 days before the election.

If Ms. Todd’s allegations are proven accurate, some voters may revisit their support for Senator Obama, not because they are racists (with due respect to Rep. John Murtha), but because they suddenly feel they do not know enough about the Democratic nominee.

If the incident turns out to be a hoax, Senator McCain’s quest for the presidency is over, forever linked to race-baiting.

For Pittsburgh, a city that has done so much to shape American history over the centuries, another moment of truth is at hand.

I just hope the police get to the bottom of this heinous crime before November 4 so I know how to vote. First, Joe the Plumber, now Ashley Todd. God forbid they find Caylee - a death knell for Obama in Florida. How many times can I revisit my support of Barack Obama and keep deciding to vote for him. Pittsburgh!!!!! The eyes of the world are watching you!

Has Fox News just thrown in the towel on any semblance of professionalism? I mean I trust Lee Webb, evening anchor for the Christian Broadcasting Network's 700 Club, to provide better news than Fox. How far away are we from camera cuts to Roger Ailes translating what Greta Van Susteren just said for the faithful viewers?

***UPDATE***: CASE CLOSED!!!!! Ashley Todd retracts every inch of her bullsh*t story, admitting to police that the attack didn't occur. She will now face charges for lying to police, filing a false report and not knowing the science of reflections in a mirror.

Epilogue? I wonder where Drudge will bury this turn of events? And congratulations Obama supporters - according to Mr. Moody of Fox News, "Senator McCain's quest for the presidency is over, forever linked to race-baiting."

Well that settles it. Now let's just see who you really are, Ms. Todd (masked pulled off). Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh, John McCain!!!!! "My friends, I would have got away with it if it wasn't for you meddling bloggers."

Actually, one more thing. Mr. Moody's comments above truly merit some revisiting: "If Ms. Todd’s allegations are proven accurate, some voters may revisit their support for Senator Obama, not because they are racists (with due respect to Rep. John Murtha), but because they suddenly feel they do not know enough about the Democratic nominee."

This could be the most absurd statement made by any commentator during this zany election. Let me play out the logic: I'm supporting Obama. A black guy mugs a white girl in Pittsburgh. As a result, I may reassess my support of Obama. Why do I do this? Is it a metaphor? Barack Obama is going to politically mug white America? That's quite a ripple effect for a single mugging. Ever notice that when someone says "not because I'm or they're racists," it's usually followed by a galactically racist statement? Like saying "no offense . . . but you're anti-American."

No more of this nonsense. 11 days to go!

***UPDATE***: WHAT? UPDATE? YOU SAID CASE CLOSED????? Talking Points Memo reports that McCain's Pennsylvania communications director, Peter Feldman, offered up facts and particulars about the debunked Ashley Todd attack to reporters before anything was known about her report - including the allegation that Todd's assailant stated "you're with the McCain campaign? I'm going to teach you a lesson" prior to assaulting her.

I'm beating Malkin to the punch. I'm giving this a "-gate" name. Working title: Mirror-Mirror-gate.


Merge Divide said...

Call me a cynic… but if I’m going to rob a woman at knife-point in front of an ATM on the busiest street in Bloomfield (which happens to be the almost-entirely-white Little Italy section of town), I’m not going to stick around afterwards to see what bumper stickers she has on her car, and then double-back to carefully scratch (it was certainly not “carved” as some would have it) a very neat backwards (or upside-down) “B” into her cheek (therefore making a political statement), and tell her I’m “teaching her a lesson”. Especially if I know that Sean Hannity just happens to be in town the next day.
I guess it’s within the realm of possibility…

Warm Apple Pie said...

You are a cynic . . . Hannity isn't coming in tomorrow . . . he flew in yesterday. Who did you think gave her the shiner? He's got a mean right cross.

Pat Bateman said...

Merge, you're absolutely right on this. Conspiracy theories be damned, this situation screams out "all else has failed - let's bring Fear of a Black Planet"!! Was this mugger suffering from undiagnosed dyslexia? A backwards "B"? You must be kidding me. Interesting point that Bloomfield is Little Italy. Didn't know that. Been mugged before. Was wearing a Yankees hat. Good thing the dude wasn't a Boston fan or I might have found myself with a backwards "B" on my face to "teach me a lesson about having a $200 million elitist payroll." Dodged a bullet on that one.

Warm Apple Pie said...

Drudge may be a bit too out-in-front of this story. I notice Ashley Todd's sensational tale is furtively sneak down the Drudge Report home page.

Merge Divide said...

Warm apple pie,

Hannity was on the air yesterday, and the "attack" was to have taken place on Wednesday. That's what I was referring to in my comment.

Anyway, Drudge is a punk. He's increasingly irrelevant to all but the most strident Kool-aid drinkers.

Warm Apple Pie said...

Merge, Oh I understood your comment and appreciated it. Hannity is like the GOP Superman - he has a knack of being where the danger lies.

Drudge is descending into partisan madness. He makes John McCain look "in touch" and "not erratic."

Merge Divide said...

I had a "conservative" blogger argue with me for an entire night, insisting that Drudge is one of the most respected news sources in the world. The funny thing is that he probably STILL believes it.

Pat Bateman said...

Funniest part (to me) of this entire situation:

"[Ashley] Todd worked in New York for the College Republican National Committee before moving two weeks ago to Pennsylvania, where her duties included recruiting college students, the committee's executive director, Ethan Eilon, has said."

She is being held against her will due to "mental problems." And yet until yesterday, the GOP had tapped her to recruit college students to their standard. Hey guys, you didn't notice this?? she didn't seem... off... to you? Perhaps this might be one reason why things aren't looking so good for you guys.

I've often said anyone voting Republican this time around was mentally disturbed. Thanks, Ashley, for making me more right than I could have possibly imagined.