Saturday, October 11, 2008

"He's an . . . an . . . Arab . . . No?"

Video of the 75-year-old woman, Gayle Quinnell, a McCain campaign volunteer, who cornered McCain at a townhall rally in Lakeview, Minnesota yesterday and proffered a criticism of Barack Obama for being an "Arab."

Here, she is engaged by a number of reporters after the rally asking for clarification of her statements to McCain.

Honestly, she doesn't emit a meanness, suffering more from a mix of dimness and dotage. And she lacks any self-awareness of her misguided views.

When it is explained that Obama's estranged father was Muslim, but that he was raised Christian by his mother's grandparents, predictably Quinnell counters "well, he's still got that Muslim in him."

Quinnell also notes her efforts on behalf of McCain-Palin: doing a mass mailer of 400 letters to people in the phonebook containing "really bad stuff" about Obama.

Yea, Though We Walk Through the Valley Of Political Death

Invocation delivered today by Reverend Arnold Conrad of the Grace Free Evangelical Church at the beginning of a McCain rally in Davenport, Iowa:

"I would also pray, Lord, that your reputation is involved in all that happens between now and November, because there are millions of people around this world praying to their god — whether it's Hindu, Buddha, Allah — that his opponent wins, for a variety of reasons . . . And Lord, I pray that you would guard your own reputation, because they're going to think that their god is bigger than you, if that happens. So I pray that you will step forward and honor your own name with all that happens between now and Election Day."

One party. Under God. The one true God. Better than your lesser gods, deities and superstitions.

And (of course) the requisite "distancing" from the McCain campaign reacting to Reverend Conrad's peculiar benediction:

"While we understand the important role that faith plays in informing the votes of Iowans, questions about the religious background of the candidates only serve to distract from the real questions in this race about Barack Obama’s judgment, policies and readiness to lead as commander in chief.”

I couldn't agree more. Then put your house in order, McCain, or are their too many bigoted moving parts? Is it even your party anymore?

"Lord, we are so scared of an Obama Presidency. Hear us! Deliver us!"

Palin's Romper Room

Governor Palin and her cabinet.

Palin abused her power, but did not overstep her authority as governor in attempting to get her ex-brother-in-law state trooper fired by bringing pressure to bear on her Public Safety Commission, Walter Monegan, then ultimately terminating his employment instead.

Just enough meat on the bone for the liberals to feed, but not enough to be sated. And certainly not enough to force Palin to gracefully bow out of the race.

But appraises the gleaming evidentiary booty contained within the Troopergate report treasure trove: a depiction of a woefully inept, bungling and puerile Palin administration, conducting affairs, wielding power and badly behaving like an elementary schoolyard bully at recess giving "wedgies," "shark bites," and "purple-nurples":

But the [Troopergate] report still makes for good reading, if only because it convincingly answers a question nobody had even thought to ask: Is the Palin administration shockingly amateurish? Yes, it is. Disturbingly so.

The 263 pages of the report show a co-ordinated application of pressure on Monegan so transparent and ham-handed that it was almost certain to end in public embarrassment for the governor. The only surprise is that Troopergate is national news, not just a sorry piece of political gristle to be chewed on by Alaska politicos over steaks at Anchorage's Club Paris.

A harsh verdict? Consider the report's findings. Not only did people at almost every level of the Palin administration engage in repeated inappropriate contact with Walt Monegan and other high-ranking officials at the Department of Public Safety, but Monegan and his peers constantly warned these Palin disciples that the contact was inappropriate and probably unlawful. Still, the emails and calls continued — in at least one instance on recorded state trooper phone lines.

Most disturbingly, the report paints Todd Palin, aka the "First Dude," as a major player in the effort to get the state trooper, then Monegan fired. In fact, the report finds that Mr. Palin often held court with Monegan in Governor Palin's office on an adjacent conference room table, berating him with binders of documentary "proof" justifying the urgent need to hand the trooper his walking papers. When Monegan vacillated, then refused, Mr. Palin became enraged and began a protocol targeting Monegan, attempting to access his personnel files and pumping his Monegan's department for information.

I shudder to think what type of power-plays, vendettas and political beatdowns Palin would and could dish out from her new digs at One Observatory Circle (only a few miles from 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue mind you).

Is Barack Obama Muslim?

Oh my God.

Is he??????

Most Likely to Suceed: Sarah Louise Heath, Wasilla High School, Class of 1982

Potatoe contributor, Patrick Bateman, shows there is no love lost between him and Sarah Palin, and no blood left for his puny liberal heart to bleed when he makes this smug wisecrack in his recent post about the Governor of Alaska's current cabinet:

"Her administration looks suspiciously like the Wasilla High School prom committee, circa 1982 (no, really - seven members of the '82 prom committee are on her staff. True story. No - it isn't. But you believed it for a second. Doesn't that tell you all you need to know about this person? That you momentarily believed that? Think about it.)."

Typical. Chairman Bateman and the rest of his red comrades getting a good communist giggle at the expense of Governor Sarah Palin. Disgusting. Sarah Palin: A maverick, a reformer, a lipsticked pitbull, a hockey mom, part of the middle class, just like you and me, the genuine article. Truly a rock star, a real bona fide American . . . . . . huh? . . . say what now? . . .

"The New York Times is reporting today that Gov. Sarah Palin appointed close friends of hers to high-paying government jobs and offered them much higher salaries than they would be entitled to in the private sector. Many of Palin’s political appointees attended Wasilla High School, something which has led observers to note that the school yearbook could serve as a directory of state government.

Let’s look at just a few of Palin’s cronies. Palin appointed Mr. Britney, her former junior high school band mate as her legislative director. Another classmate, Joe Austermann manages the economic development office for $82,908 a year. Palin also hired her former schoolmate, Franci Havemeister to head the State Department of Agriculture. Havemeister previously worked as a real estate agent and cited her childhood love of cows as qualifications to run the agency. Ms. Havemeister earns $95,000 a year as director of the agency."

From the impartially-titled blog Sarah Palin Exposed. But every fact from the Times article has been verified.

Um . . . hmmm . . . well . . . ahhh . . . let me tell you about a gentleman by the name of William Ayers.

I got your back, Bateman.

Friday, October 10, 2008

Palin Found Guilty After Finding Self Not Guilty

As many of you no doubt have read or will read on the Internets, the Googles or the Interwebs, whatever your information portal of choice - even, heaven forbid, an old fashioned newspaper made out of, I believe, dinosaur skin - the bipartisan report by the Alaska state legislature has been released. And sure as rootin' tootin', fresh 'n fruit'n, that ol' Wasilla Main Street straightalker, Sarah Palin, inaugural member and so far only ever GILF, is guilty of abusing her power in firing a dude who didn't want to fire another dude who had divorced her sister or something.

Listen, this report doesn't thrill me. I wouldn't have taken the time to post for you people just on the results of this report. I have other things to do. No effing sheit she abused her power. Her administration looks suspiciously like the Wasilla High School prom committee, circa 1982 (no, really - seven members of the '82 prom committee are on her staff. True story. No - it isn't. But you believed it for a second. Doesn't that tell you all you need to know about this person? That you momentarily believed that? Think about it.). Sarah is the top dawg and she abuses everyone from Todd on down. That "first dude" has definitely worn ankle cuffs and strap on moose antlers if you catch my drift. So the fact that she basically berated this guy in violation of something or other is not surprising to me in the least. Nor is it surprising that a state legislature that I would bet dollars to donuts that she pushes around regularly is quietly enjoying the role reversal and getting to stick it to her in a way several of the pundits on this site would like to. But that's another story.

NONE of this is the point. The POINT, dear readers, is that she was already found to have been NOT in violation of any laws, regulations, kosher dietary restrictions or removing the tags from her Sealy posturopedic. A report released just yesterday demonstrated her innocence from these inflammatory charges. And what brave soul had the courage in these troubled times to come forward and absolve Sarah Palin of the smack of wrongdoing? Well, in an homage to the adage that if you want something done right, do it yourself, the report was issued by none other than Sarah Palin.

Yes, ahead of today's bipartisan legislative report finding her guilty of abuse of power, Sarah Palin, in a well-reasoned and thoroughly vetted report released yesterday said, My Cousin Vinny style, that everything that committee is gonna say tomorrow is [expletive deleted]. No, really. She released her OWN report. I don't even have a joke for this. She released her own report. In it, she interviewed both herself and also I think maybe one of her kids to see what they thought about it. She also I believe asked her dry cleaner some questions and had a spirited back and forth with her Inuit cleaning lady about the issue. In the end, the evidence gleaned from inside Sarah Palin's head clearly demonstrated that Sarah Palin was not guilty of anything except a massive amount of hubris.

I'm releasing my own report countering the toxicology screening showing that I'm a full-blown alcoholic and my liver is the liver of a 73 year old Irish dock worker. In my hard-hitting interview with my own liver, I will refute all of these scurrilous allegations that denigrate either me or the health of my liver.

Sarah Palin. I salute you. Releasing your own report. Hubris run amok... someone needs to take you over their knee, Sarah. But still, I salute you. Well, I'm using both hands to type. But salute you I still do, if you catch my drift you minx.

McCain Realizes the Flames are Out of Control

Pretty amazing video from Minnesota. And pretty amazing how depressingly ignorant some Americans are. There are honest, uneducated citizens that have a more basic view of the world. Then there are recklessly uninformed simpletons who are violating their citizen's end of the bargain with the United States.

These people are shameful and dim the light that should be America. Very sad.

McCain Fights For His Political Soul . . .

. . . and the votes of rational thinking independents and moderates.

From Time, by way of contributor Defective Pants, McCain contains the fire and beats back the barbarian hoards.

The McCain-Pal-ynch Mob

From NBC's Mark Murray:

Earlier today, Obama remarked on recent outbursts of "Traitor!" "Terrorist!" and "Kill him!" at McCain campaign events. "It's easy to rile up a crowd," Obama said. "Nothing's easier than riling up a crowd by stoking anger and division. But that's not what we need right now in the United States."

In response, McCain senior adviser Nicolle Wallace released this statement, NBC's Kelly O'Donnell reports. "Barack Obama's assault on our supporters is insulting and unsurprising. These are the same people obama called 'bitter' and attacked for 'clinging to guns' and faith. He fails to understand that people are angry at corrupt practices in Washington and Wall Street and he fails to understand that America's working families are not 'clinging' to anything other than the sincere hope that Washington will be reformed from top to bottom."

"Attacking our supporters is a new low for the campaign that's run more millions of dollars of negative ads than any other in history."

So no unqualified rejection or strong denouncement of paroxysms of rage hurled from certain members of the crowd at McCain-Palin rally, calling Obama a "terrorist" or demanding his death?!?!?!? Obama comments touched on stoking crowd anger and riling up the crowd, by no means a critique of McCain supporters' political views and opinions.

The McCain campaign is free-falling from negative and shrill to sickening and dangerous.

To channel Drudge for a moment, Devolving . . .

They're Trying to Kill Him

Accuse him of palling around with terrorists? Check
Say he doesn't see America the way that ordinary Americans do? Check
Claim he is - hint, hint - from the street? Check
Insinuate that his campaign is funded by foreign terrorists? Check
Stoke the fires of hatred and racism? Check
Invoke cries of "terrorist!" and "traitor!"? Check
Look the other way when a supporter advocates murder? Check
Defend those views as coming from "ordinary Americans?" Check
Taking it a step further and actually accusing Obama of attacking those same violent, enraged nutjobs? Holy shit, check

McCain has gone too far. Will an adult please step in before one of these wackjobs takes the obvious cues being given by McCain and "puts country first" by trying to take Obama out? Really.


McCain camp defends the behavior?
Posted: Friday, October 10, 2008 3:30 PM by Mark MurrayFiled Under:
From NBC's Mark MurrayEarlier today, Obama remarked on recent outbursts of "Traitor!" "Terrorist!" and "Kill him!" at McCain campaign events. "It's easy to rile up a crowd," Obama said. "Nothing's easier than riling up a crowd by stoking anger and division. But that's not what we need right now in the United States."

In response, McCain senior adviser Nicolle Wallace released this statement, NBC's Kelly O'Donnell reports. "Barack Obama's assault on our supporters is insulting and unsurprising. These are the same people obama called 'bitter' and attacked for 'clinging to guns' and faith. He fails to understand that people are angry at corrupt practices in Washington and Wall Street and he fails to understand that America's working families are not 'clinging' to anything other than the sincere hope that Washington will be reformed from top to bottom."

"Attacking our supporters is a new low for the campaign that's run more millions of dollars of negative ads than any other in history."

*** UPDATE *** McCain campaign spokesman Brian Rogers adds in another statement: “Barack Obama’s attacks on Americans who support John McCain reveal far more about him than they do about John McCain. It is clear that Barack Obama just doesn’t understand regular people and the issues they care about. He dismisses hardworking middle class Americans as clinging to guns and religion, while at the same time attacking average Americans at McCain rallies who are angry at Washington, Wall Street and the status quo."

Why Obama is Always in the Bathroom

Hahahaha - "You want some of Barack too, Palin? Um . . . there is plenty to, um, go around."


How Randolph and Mortimer Duke ruined the economy

I'll admit it, I know even less about the economy than John McCain, and believe me "my friends," that's saying a mouthful. What little I do know did not come from watching shouty douche-nozzle Jim Cramer, or any other self-anointed experts. No, I learned everything I know about the economy from Trading Places, and what is happening in our economy can be explained by reference to it.

For instance, the reason AIG needed to be bailed out is because they didn't have enough money to cover all of the bad mortgages they insured through CDOs. Consider the following:

[after breaking a vase]
Billy Ray Valentine: Hey, sorry about that.
Randolph Duke: It's perfectly all right William. It was your vase.
Billy Ray Valentine: That was a cheap vase, right? That was a fake? Right?
Randolph Duke: I believe we paid $35,000. But if I remember correctly, we valued it for the insurance company at $50,000. You see, Mortimer? William has already made us $15,000. [Coleman, Mortimer, Randolph, and Billy Ray start laughing]
Billy Ray Valentine: You want me to break something else?
Randolph Duke, Mortimer Duke, Coleman: NO!

The principle is that you can break stuff if you value it more highly than it's worth and you make money doing it. You only have to stop breaking things when the insurance company runs out of cash because everyone is breaking their stuff.

The current crisis on Wall Street similarly can be explained by Trading Places:

Randolph Duke: Exactly why do you think the price of pork bellies is going to keep going down, William?
Billy Ray Valentine: Okay, pork belly* prices have been dropping all morning, which means that everybody is waiting for it to hit rock bottom, so they can buy low. Which means that the people who own the pork belly contracts are saying, "Hey, we're losing all our damn money, and Christmas is around the corner, and I ain't gonna have no money to buy my son the G.I. Joe with the kung-fu grip! And my wife ain't gonna f... my wife ain't gonna make love to me if I got no money!" So they're panicking right now, they're screaming "SELL! SELL!" to get out before the price keeps dropping. They're panicking out there right now, I can feel it. [on the ticker machine, the price keeps dropping]
Randolph Duke: He's right, Mortimer! My God, look at it!

Bottom line: I don't know what the hell I'm talking about, because when I was growing up, if we wanted a jacuzzi we had to fart in the tub, but I sure am good looking.

*Pork bellies, which is used to make bacon, which you might find in a bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwich.

Posted by Jack Knowledge

Sarah Palin Visits My Dreams

Any shrinks out there? Had a strange dream last night about Sarah Palin:

It's a little fuzzy, but I first found myself in the produce section of a grocery store. I was apparently running for public office. There was a huge spread of vegetables stacked high like a mountain. I grabbed a tomato and gave a stump speech about its virtues: "A tomato wants liberty and freedom and democracy just like we yearn for those things. A tomato is tolerant and fair just like we are tolerant and fair." Something like that.

Suddenly, Palin emerged from the crowd of onlookers, wearing a pink Sean John jump suit, and screamed "avocados!!!!!" She then started climbing the vegetable mountain. Whe she reached the apex she held up the crowning avocado and yelped "I hold the avocado, you betcha!" The crowd hooted wildy and let out thunderous applause. Whe she descended back down, she jumped off the veggies, winked at me and then smacked my on the ass like I was rounding third after hitting a home run.

Things got a little confused after that, but the dream came back into focus at a construction site in downtown Manhattan. Similarly another indeterminate political rally. This time I was wearing a singlet - you know - like King Kong Bundy. In the middle of the construction pit were two turntables. Suddenly a slow murmur befell the crowd, followed by clapping: It was Palin again - this time decked out in red, white and blue sun dress with Fourth of July sparkler planted in a fifties bee-hive hairdo. Curtsying for the crowd's approval, Palin gave me the finger - yes, Sarah Palin flipped me the bird - pointed in my direction and yelled over and over again: "Fat Boy on a diet. Fat Boy on a diet. Fat Boy on a diet." Her words were strangely modulated, like Lil' Wayne recording "Lollipop." The crowd erupted in belly laughter and chanted "Fat Boy, Fat Boy, Fat Boy."

After her supporters settled down, Palin leaped into the air, landed on top the turn tables, squatted and (I feel uncomfortable about this next part too) urinated on the equipment. Yep . . . she peed on the turntables.

Then she winked at me again.

I woke up drowning in sweat. In a panic I looked down the bed - thank goodness: The last time I pissed the bed will still remain freshman year, Greek Week.

What does it mean?

Mrs. McMaverick Plays Sanitation Worker Too

"WASHINGTON (AP) - Cindy McCain has accused Democratic presidential nominee Barack Obama of running 'the dirtiest campaign in American history.'

In remarks reported Tuesday by The Tennessean, she said she initially did not want her husband John McCain to seek the Republican presidential nomination after a brutal primary struggle in 2000 against George W. Bush.

By the way, Cindy McCain's . . . um . . . modern take on Count Dracula, cost all told an estimated $318,000, including three-carat $280,000 diamond earrings. Her style is all the rage on Main Street with Joe Six-Packs and Hockey Moms emulating her look. "I spent a month's paycheck on a Oscar De La Renta thread and it is so worth it," said Ima Dupeeveryfouryearsa, wearing a sweatsuit from the new Spring line at Target, with a gold thread lying on her shoulder. "It's just like Cindy's ensemble - she's so like us. So not elite."

'The days of Ronald Reagan and Tip O'Neill are what we need to look to: a divided government but a government that needs to agree to disagree,' Cindy McCain told reporters after visiting children at a Nashville hospital and prior to the presidential debate. 'We're now seeing polarizing factions, people politicizing things that should be about what's best for America. Instead, they're doing what's best for themselves.'

The Obama campaign declined to comment.

In 2000, John McCain lost the GOP primary in South Carolina to George W. Bush due in large part to insinuations that he fathered an illegitimate child. The couple adopted one daughter, Bridget, from Mother Teresa's orphanage in Bangladesh.

Her comments came as the McCain campaign's tone has become increasingly harsh.

Nearly every TV ad McCain ran last week was negative, compared to just 34 percent of those by Obama, according to an analysis by the Wisconsin Advertising Project released on Wednesday.

Also on Wednesday, Cindy McCain criticized Obama for voting against a bill to pay for the troops in Iraq.

'The day that Sen. Obama cast a vote not to fund my son when he was serving sent a cold chill through my body, let me tell you,' she told a Pennsylvania crowd before introducing the Arizona senator and his running mate Sarah Palin.

In fact, Obama consistently voted for Iraq troop financing except on one occasion. In May 2007, he voted against a troop-funding bill because it did not also specify steps for a withdrawal.

And McCain has not always voted for money for the troops. On one troop-funding bill supported by Obama, McCain missed the vote and encouraged President Bush to veto it, because it did call for withdrawal."

Is it pernicion, self-denial, political myopia or unthinkable ignorance. Can we be very far from Todd Palin"s, aka Greta's "First Dude," astute view of Obama to inject a little more toxicity to McCain-Palin rallies.

"Um . . . don't really know the dude . . . um . . . you know, I just really like to ride snowmobiles . . . um, got no real bone to pick with the man . . ."

(searing look from Sarah)

". . . right . . . well, I don't know him because he don't let no one know him . . . he's a terrorist . . . I mean, crap, crap . . . I mean he likes the terrorists, American terrorists that is. He's a black fella too . . . that can't be good."

God Bless America. God Damn America. God Save America.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Dem Democrat "Hooligans"

"I am madder than a old wet hen. Let me translate dat der jumble-o-words I just dropped on yah, McCain: I ain't happy as a pig in slog no more. Even dem lipstick pig variety and such. Get dem commie bastards, Pelosi, the lot of em, and that uppity boy Obama. Get him good!"

Get them, Johnny. Go get them!!!! Burst through that door and hack'em up!!!!!

Nothing is more Americana then an ol' country kook cleaning the crust from his mouth, rattling his partisan chains around like Jacob Marley, calling the Democrats "hooligans" and "socialists," atavistically referring to "an Obama" like he's subhuman for having a feasible health care plan, then starting a hackneyed "U.S.A . . . U.S.A." chant just in case you thought McCain was hosting a tea party in Paris.

And the curmudgeon's incendiary red glare, an octogenarians head full of air! Francis Scott Key was the original Toby Keith. Yippeee! U.S.A! Obama is a muslim, terrorist, radical! Kill darky! U.S.A.! U.S.A.!

The gap is shrinking between embellishment and what my eyes perceive. That's frightening.

Whether it's Dennis Miller deranged bellicosity on the O'Reilly Factor, looking into the camera and screaming at McCain to "fight, John. Fight!!!" or Michelle Malkin making the case for her own internment because she can't live under a Democratic administration, the Republican Party is fraying at the base (or is it a Socialist administration as the next bucket of radical paint is dumped on Barack Obama for tomorrow's news cycle).

There are many revealing moments in the short video of Waukesha, Wisconsin apoplexy! A complete lack of respect for McCain, the rampaging codger giving the "maverick" senator the business and telling him in campaign speak to "shut his piehole" (ie, "Let me finish, please"). The imbecilic dissonance of two sequential sentences, one saying "and I'm not mad about the economy," the very next sentence shrieking I'm mad "about the socialists taking over our country."

Socialism (as defined by Merriam Webster): Any of various economic and political theories advocating collective or governmental ownership and administration of the means of production and distribution of goods.

Hey Wilford Brimley - you're mad at the economy, you f**king wingnut, or at least you will be when they repossess your PT Cruiser, they take your job away greeting at the Wall-Mart and disabuse you of your last five dollars because the church needed it! It's the Christian thing to do.

What's the use. There is an exorbitant premium on making sense within conservative dens during the last throes of what Karl Rove touted "50 years of Republican domination."

I found McCain's instinctual response to the surly fella even more fascinating. It's almost like he's uncomfortable consorting with these vitriolic crackers demanding a political lynching of Obama. "Act together because all of us are Americans first." All of us. And McCain will "work with anyone" and "work together as one nation indivisible."

But the ideological dummies, clod fanatics of neo-conservatism on the wan and firebrand zealots waving their bibles wildy don't want bipartisanship, cooperation or even the "maverick" persona McCain and Palin shill.

They want leftist blood. They want to murder liberalism. They have no idea why. The rhetoric is a hodge-podge of hate, fear, insecurity, a dollup of subconscious racism (a bigger helping for some folks) and confusion. They cannot formulate sentences to express this madness. It's a venomous melange of terrorism, communism, socialism, radicalism, liberalism, nihilism and any other "ism" reduced and muddled into formless chimeras haunting the good neighbors on Main Street, Mayberry as they slumber.

It's a request for grotesque and unseemly tactics that John McCain may not fulfill - for two reasons:

One, a political view, that this election is not won by preaching to the converted at Republican rallies, but by appealing to the whopping 40% of the electorate that consider themselves independent, many of them rational thinkers, unfettered by party talking points.

And two, a moral view (really, an American view): that I will not spark a match and set this country ablaze when the blood in my veins pulses with doing the right, but sometimes unpopular thing and working with members of both parties if that's what it takes to accomplish it.

How ironic: McCain might lose this election because he truly does put "country first." As dirty as it's getting, McCain may not be willing to cross every line, only most of them. And that will come up short.


Dow Jones dips below 9000, drops 680 points today, down for eight straight days. No credit. No lending. No trust. No confidence.

In the words of one financial analyst, Billy Ray Valentine:

"Okay, pork belly prices have been dropping all morning, which means that everybody is waiting for it to hit rock bottom, so they can buy low. Which means that the people who own the pork belly contracts are saying, "Hey, we're losing all our damn money, and Christmas is around the corner, and I ain't gonna have no money to buy my son the G.I. Joe with the kung-fu grip! And my wife ain't gonna f... my wife ain't gonna make love to me if I got no money!" So they're panicking right now, they're screaming "SELL! SELL!" to get out before the price keeps dropping. They're panicking out there right now, I can feel it."

First, the foreclosures on "subprime" (a euphemism for "bat sh*t crazy risk of default, no way this jester is paying, this bank is run by nutcups") mortgages - this all started with a single loan officer shaking the hand of a single home mortgagor with a 600 credit score and a fledgling career as a Subway sandwich artist, agreeing to lend purchase-money (all the purchase-money - asking for earnest money is so passe) for a $900,000 home.

Then the companies which purchased, repackaged and pooled these mortgages crash. Then the hedge funds creating and issuing mortgage-backed securities can't meet their calls. They crash. Next the monolithic, seemingly impermeable investment bank parents of hedge funds incinerate in a plume of mountainous debt, dead paper and "under water" home loans (Bear Stearns, Lehman Brothers, etc.). Next, insurance companies with financial product divisions and a weakness for $23,000 "rub-n-tugs" start to falter.

Free market weeps. Free market calls its nemesis - The Federal Government - and panhandles for a trillion dollars in loose change. The Federal Government acts quickly approving a 700 billion dollar bailout backed by the American taxpayer promise "we probably won't move to Canada and continue to pay taxes . . . probably."

Whoops, I misspoke - forgot about that $30 billion to prop up Bear Stearns. Well, come to think about it, there was $200 billion to Freddie Mac and Fannie May. And the $800 billion of liquidity pumped by the Federal Reserve this week.

Good point - the $80 billion to AIG too. That's pretty bananas, to handout so much . . . what's that . . . you are sh*ttin' me? . . . another $38 billion! Jesus Christ, they spent $445,000 in government cake on a filthy, hedonistic executive retreat, replete with hookers, drugs and dirty stroke massages, less than a week after receiving the first installment.

Note: I have not a shred of evidence that AIG threw the biggest, most indulgent bachelor party in history. I'm only saying AIG spent $23,000 on at the "hotel spa" and $10,000 on what was termed in the ledgers "leisure dining." For $33,000, I'm pretty sure that masseuse/chef gave a hell of a deep tissue rubdown, maybe Thai, cooked a fine meal, and then blew and sucked dry every AIG executive for the next 72 hours.

That's sort of sexist, Warm Apple Pie: How do you know the execs were all men? I don't. That's why I was using the genderless "blew and sucked dry" which encompasses "tongue flutters" and "finger bangs."

I digress.

The market plummets each day. There's no lending between companies, no credit approved, no movement of liquid assets for debt. The Fed cuts interest rates. The World Bank cuts rates. Still no confidence.

And that brings us to today's market debacle. Let's look to tomorrow. Sun will come out! Right? Tomorrow, right?

Credit is frozen and credit is the foundation of our economy. The financial sector is paralyzed with fear. Each major player holds onto its dwindling value with kung-fu grip. The spigot is closed so the crisis "trickles down" instead of a cascade of money. Now, blue chip companies, manufacturers, industrial outfits can't get credit. In turn, no credit means no operating capital, and no operating capital means payroll is unrealizable.

If they can't pay you, they can't employ you. The ominous reports of firm-wide layoffs begin. 1000 folks here and there. And familiar names too: General Motors, Ebay, Coca-Cola, maybe even supposed tech gems like Google and Microsoft. 1000 becomes 5000, 10,000. The unemployment rate ticks up: 6%, 6.3%, 7%. Unemployment means you cannot meet your personal obligations and the financial sector takes a second big hit on credit card debts (guess what? That debt was repackaged, sold, pooled and securitized as well by Wall Street drinking from its infinite wisdom well).

Now, unemployed Joe six-pack (drinking Coors instead of Stella now) is out of options. Once gainfully employed, he can't bring in income (it's unfortunate - a little "ancillary" treat is the 100,000 dollars his 401K coughed up in less than a year. At age 59, Joe six-pack had planned retirement in a few years. Try 20 years now, Joe, assuming you can get a job. 59 year olds are prime candidates for employers.).

Like the subprime buyers, Joe owns a home too. He's a mortgagor. Fairly, he wasn't classified as a subprime risk when he purchased his home. He even put some money down with a decent credit score. But he's going to default because there's no work. Here comes another round of foreclosures - this time for genuinely low risk borrowers.

And guess f**king what: these home loans were, again, repackaged, sold, pooled and securitized by Wall Street drinking from its infinite wisdom well.

Around and around the circle of distrust we go. The disastrous cycle begins again.

But dammit, We may go down. We may lose our jobs. We may lose our houses, our cars, our families, our American pride. However, with the timely help of John McCain, we will get to the bottom of the Ayers-Obama connection I promise you.

Which is it, Senator Obama???? Did you say "hello" to Ayers in your chance neighborhood meeting or did you say "hello, how are you." Which is it, Senator???? Why are you snickering??? What, because I'm wearing a barrel with suspenders and eating a cat? Well, I'm having some issues with solvency. It's none of your business, Barack Hussein Obama! What's that? You have a plan to help the economy! Quit trying to change the subject! Now, you served on a charitable board with Ayers. Hmmm, how big was the table you sat at during meetings? Were you next to Ayers or across the table? Was lunch served at the meetings? Answer the questions!

They say the band played on when the Titanic was sinking. We might as well laugh as we break ground on the future site of Barter Town, draft the "Laws of 8" and spray paint "12 monkeys" on the garage door of the house we just got evicted from.

I'm sure living underground will be lovely. I can't wait to my grandkids evolve into mole people.

What did the 5 fingers say to the face?

SLAP!! Obama camp getting tough.

MSNBC First Read:

ST. JOSEPH, MO – Joe Biden echoed the campaign’s response to continued Republican efforts to highlight Obama’s past associations, adding a personal touch to the idea that McCain wasn’t willing to make the attacks in person.“All of the things they said about Barack Obama in the TV, on the TV, at their rallies, and now on YouTube … John McCain could not bring himself to look Barack Obama in the eye and say the same things to him,” Biden said this morning. “In my neighborhood, when you’ve got something to say to a guy, you look him in the eye and you say it to him.”

Biden, who arrived on stage in St. Joseph to chants of “Joe! Joe! Joe,” urged the crowd not to be distracted by McCain claims, saying that every “false charge, every baseless accusation is an attempt to get you to stop paying attention to what’s going on in this country and what’s going on in your lives.” And on the issues that matter, he said, McCain is offbase, particularly on his newest mortgage plan.

Coats adds:

Frankly, I've always believed that the quickest way to show you're a chump is to run around telling everyone about that aren't one. You want to prove to the American people that you aren't shook? Don't talk them to death. Get in the ring and kick the other guys ass. It's that simple. Screw all this talk about who's tougher than who. Here is what I know: McCain will talk that shit about Ayers and brag about taking the gloves off. He will send his wife and Sarah Palin out to do his dirty work. But when faced with the man who he believes "palls around with terrorist" he played his position.

Obama - "Say it to my face, Maverick!":

Sambo? Not Her Style.

Charley James, a self-described "American journalist, author and essayist who lives in Toronto" (an expatriate! I'm dubious already), claims Governor Palin described Barack Obama's hard fought victory of Hillary Clinton in a manner worthy of note to Alaskan locals at a diner:

"So Sambo beat the bitch!" This is how Republican Vice Presidential nominee Sarah Palin described Barack Obama's win over Hillary Clinton to political colleagues in a restaurant a few days after Obama locked up the Democratic Party presidential nomination.

According to Lucille, the waitress serving her table at the time and who asked that her last name not be used, Gov. Palin was eating lunch with five or six people when the subject of the Democrat's primary battle came up. The governor, seemingly not caring that people at nearby tables would likely hear her, uttered the slur and then laughed loudly as her meal mates joined in appreciatively.

The article connects Palin with other racial epithets such as the very colorful "Artic Arabs" (very Disney-sounding) describing Alaska's aboriginal population or opting for a more classically bawdy tact, lumping in a number of folks as "f**king Eskimos."

Sambo? I don't think so. I mean wouldn't you fancy Palin as more of a "N" word type of gal? Sambo shows a bit too much keen hate-mongering, able to delineate Obama's constituent parts - the word "Sambo" extracted from the 1899 page turner Little Black Sambo depicting an indian boy's triumph over a pack of ravenous tigers and used in bigoted circles to denote a person of mixed African and Amerindian heritage. Of course, Sambo now pretty much conflates all African-Americans into one lump of dark-skinned people. Perhaps Palin is cognizant of such nuances and said "fair game on that Sambo there, also, you betcha he is a Sambo and I'm going to talk straight to those folks on main street about Sambo too as well."

Most telling: only James has reported this diner exchange in his article published more than a month ago. The mainstream media is not exactly blowing on these embers.

Conclusion: Unsubstantiated. Likely false.

Economics of Electability

Fascinating chart from State of the Union. I suspect that the conspiracy theories about the Democrats intentionally tanking the economy to win the election will begin in 5 . . . 4 . . . 3 . . . 2 . . . DOH!

Political Punch comments:
Blip, you want a conspiracy theory? What if the Democrats INTENTIONALLY sabotaged our economy for political gain. If they didn't plan this from the very outset (pushing the subprime flexible mortgage rates on those who could not afford to pay the mortgages even before the skyrocketting mortgage payments; knowing that eventually the housing market would turn south causing chaos and a crisis), they certainly intentionally ignored the numerous warnings.
And if you look back over the past several years, even when the economy was booming the Democrats (and the mainstream media) continued to portray our
economy as failing. Sure looks like they were hoping for an economic crisis. And now you want to reward them by giving them the keys to the White House?

Amazing the depths that Dems will plunge this country and our citizens to,
just to have their socialist messiah elected.You wanted him; well, it looks
like he'll bankrupt us all to get us what you wanted.
Costing the American people millions, creating fear, and intentionally tanking
the market, all to win the election. Helluva portence for an Obama presidency.
American Spectator:
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi ordered her Majority Whip, Jim Clyburn, to essentially not do his job in the runup to the vote on Monday for the negotiated Wall Street bailout plan, according to House Democrat leadership aides."Clyburn was not whipping the votes you would have expected him to, in part because he was uncomfortable doing it, in part because we didn't want the push for votes to be successful," says one leadership aide. "All we needed was enough to potentially get us over the finish line, but we wanted the Republicans to be the ones to do it. This was not going to be a Democrat-passed bill if the Speaker had anything to say about it."

Where could they have gotten that crazy idea? Oh yeah:
Statement from McCain campaign:

From the minute John McCain suspended his campaign and arrived in Washington to address this crisis, he was attacked by the Democratic leadership: Senators Obama and Reid, Speaker Pelosi and others. Their partisan attacks were an effort to gain political advantage during a national economic crisis. By doing so, they put at risk the homes, livelihoods and savings of millions of American families.

Barack Obama failed to lead, phoned it in, attacked John McCain, and refused to even say if he supported the final bill.Just before the vote, when the outcome was still in doubt, Speaker Pelosi gave a strongly worded partisan speech and poisoned the outcome.

This bill failed because Barack Obama and the Democrats put politics ahead of country.

Humanity in the Ranks

Here's part two of the McCain-Palin Mob video. And here the condescension of the liberal videographer becomes apparent (I am above these country bumpkins).

Right, all Republicans are dumb and congregate in a mindless hoards to hate blacks, gays and minorities. And here the unctuous liberal videographer of the "Mob" has an immense axe to grind. C'mon - you had certain folks being absolutely lucid in their response to the "you think Obama is a terrorist" lead-in, responding "no" and leaning on his association with Ayers (I'm not saying its a valid logical end, but reflects logical processes at work from those "dumb" Republicans), yet you keep plugging away looking for worthy clips for predetermined ends.

I look to my left. I look to my right. All I see are demagogues. All I see are inciters.

Marshalling Forces

The McCain war drums . . . growing louder. Playing with political nitroglycerine. Turning the mob into a seething, frothing, critical mass has consequences.

Some folks just say crazy sh*t. Other folks say crazy sh*t and back it up with crazy action.

However, in fairness, there is a part two of the McCain-Palin Mob video shot by that also gives glimpse into the seamy values of the far left, looking to humiliate folks for their personal amusement.

Defective DJ - 2 Turntables and a Microphone

So I've decided that I will periodically use my microphone to let everyone know what albums are in heavy rotation on my 2 turntables. The current list

Okkervil River - The Stand Ins - Lyrically, a masterpiece. Part 2 (to Part 1 The Stage Names) of the band's loose interpretation of the pursuit of fame and the downside of reaching that goal. Gets better with every listen.

Vampire Weekend - Vampire Weekend - Just when I think I'm done with this album, I feel the urge to give it another spin. It hasn't let me down yet.

Dan Zanes & Friends - Rocket Ship Beach - When you have a toddler that loves music, you thank God every day that he brought you Dan Zanes.

Guru - Baldhead Slick and da Click - Dan Zanes? Hit 'em Slick: "yo f#%$ that kiddy crap, I did that stupid sh&* already jack." A trip back to when Hip Hop was good, from a guy who's been there the whole time.

Frightened Rabbit - The Midnight Organ Fight - Scott Hutchison sings as honestly as anyone I've heard - he suffers through every song and believes what he is singing. And I can't help but be right there with him.

From the "this hadn't officially happened yet?" department...

So the NRA today - that's the National Rifle Association to you, not the NRA from FDR's first term (if you'd like to know more about THAT NRA, drop me an email. Exciting stuff.) - announced, in a press release that absolutely left me standing here beside myself, that it has endorsed the McCain/Palin ticket.

Holy spent shell casings, Batman! The surprise was not that a ticket including a former POW and Vietnam vet and a woman who likes to shoot sheit for no particular reason, and who also "[a]s mayor of Wasilla, Alaska...used $750 from her city campaign fund to upgrade her NRA membership" was endorsed by the NRA. (note: nice campaign spending. Go up there and give 'em some Main Street Wasilla common sense, Sarah.) The surprise was that it was announced... now?

Don't get me wrong - they've been opposing Barak Hussein Al-Hezbollah all along. But now, McCain has the official support of the group, because the group says that Obama is "waffling on gun-rights issues and [they are] challenging his statements that he supports the right to bear arms. Obama has said he respects the Second Amendment but doesn't think it precludes 'some commonsense gun laws so that we don't have kids being shot on the streets of cities like Chicago.'" Naturally, that's a crazy, lunatic-fringe position. Exactly the sort of position I'd expect a terrorist to take. (Note: don't you always see Muslim terrorists walking around with guns? Do you see Obama walking around with guns? And yet you still think so, don't you?)

Is the NRA still here? Oh, there you guys are. Wow, you're still a politically relevant entity, huh? Shocking. What I don't understand is why you took so long to weigh in on this election in an official manner - was there ever, EVER a doubt which ticket you were going to endorse? Why didn't you just endorse the 2008 Republican ticket generally four years ago, the day after Bush's second inauguration, and just call it a day? Oh, you wanted to keep us in suspense did you? I see. Like a big mystery. It was Professor Plum, in the Kitchen with the Uzi.

I have a silly question to ask you, NRA, because I assume you're reading this, because I assume at all times all people are reading what I write, especially those about whom I am making fun. Or at least, NRA, have someone with above a third grade reading level read this to you, and if there are any words you don't understand, have them explain the meaning to you in a slow, measured way. (who am I kidding. I do not even write at a third grade level. No child left behind my ass) So, NRA, as I was saying... you're the national RIFLE association, right? Rifles. So why is it that I only hear about you bitching and moaning when it comes to pistols (and sometimes semi-autos, but don't get me started on that). As any card-carrying NRA member would know, a rifle is not a pistol. Sure they're both guns, but that's like saying a Protestant is a Catholic because they both ultimately believe in Jesus at the end of the day.

If you want to represent the interests of pistols, why are you not the national rifle AND pistol association? Or the national gun association? Or possibly the national "we like stuff that kills us something or blows something up" association? I just don't understand why you'd restrict yourself to rifles and then go way off-message. Pistols are not rifles. Thus, Glocks, Berettas, Magnums, Saturday Night Specials... none of these items are under your umbrella. You are representing rifles and rifle owners. And I'm pisspot tired of you overstepping your bounds. Change your name or shut the hell up.

If you will now excuse me, I am late for my Scheizer Porn Addicts Anonymous meeting.

The Blog of William Charles Ayer

Trolling the Internet for information on Bill Ayers, former head of the radical left wing organization the "Weather Underground, which orchestrated a series of bombings on government buildings in the early seventies, and whose connection to Barack Obama has come under fire from the Republicans in the past four days?

Oh, you're not? What's that? You're watching Real World/Road Rules: The Island? Um . . . well. Sorry to interrupt you then.

When the show ends (see, I'm DVR'ing it - Wednesday's rotation is The Island and Project Runway and I would gladly vote for Sarah Palin in exchange for Kenley's long-awaited "Auf Viedersehn" from fraulein Klum), why don't you measure the man, the purportedly sable silhouette of Mr. Ayers at his blog:

Some intriguing posts by Mr. Ayers - some from his own voice. I found this tidbit worthy of comment from a post dated January 30, 2008 written reflexively to President Bush's final State of the Union address:

"The picture is grim: Empire resurrected in the name of a renewed and powerful jingoistic nationalism; war without end; identification of opaque and ill-defined enemies as a unifying cause; unprecedented and unapologetic military expansion and militarism of the entire society; white supremacy essentially intact and unyielding; the entangling of religion with government; the shredding of constitutional rights, the casual disregard for human rights, and the systemic hollowing out of democracy; corporate power unchecked and the ideology of the market promoted as the only true expression of democracy; fraudulent elections; a steady drumbeat of public secrets — obvious lies issued by the powerful, like 'we don’t torture,' whose purpose is both future deniability as well as evidence of power’s ability to have its way regardless of law or popular will . . ."

Makes you want to blow something up, huh? (Note: I can make this joke and avoid P.C. vilification simply because all of Ayers's erstwhile pyrotechnics resulted in no human death or harm - Ayers's claims an outcome by design - though I am horrified that he is not in prison and somehow resides in the lofty corridors of Chicago academia, and generally held in high regards. Only Professor Orenthal James Simpson being appointed Faculty Emeritus at USC's College of Criminology could disturb me more).
Dispatching levity for a moment, the blog is worth a gander.

Posted by Warm Apple Pie

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Lauren Palin Upton

The fusion I have been looking for: The amalgam of Miss Teen South Carolina, Governor Sarah Palin and talking heads!

Courtesy of Headzup.

Posted by Warm Apple Pie.

17,999,997 Cracks in the Glass Ceiling, Hillary. These Three Votes Shouldn't Count

Ah, Hillary supporters . . . on an ATV.

With Obama approaching a double digit lead in national polls and an seemingly insurmountable electoral college advantage, and with the McCain campaign getting increasingly desperate, I fear these final weeks could descend into race-baiting and crudely regress to the demonization of the black candidate with the funny-sounding Arab name painted as the radical leader of political miscegenation.

You can see the hints of it already from surrogates. I would hope that McCain would choose defeat over an inflammatory, treacherous win and put a stop to the nonsense before it gets out of control.

Gimme the records, bitch

Listen, faithful readers (oh, wait, there aren't any yet. Well, retrospectively, listen, okay?), I don't have a lot of time this afternoon. But I'm catching a lot of flack from my fellow pundits for not posting. I don't mean actual flack the kind that our Marines don't have jackets for, but just electronic flack. But I bristle at the suggestion that I will not contribute, and thus I am.

I did not watch the debate, because I knew what was going to happen. McCain would wander aimlessly around on the stage, wondering where the town hall was that he was supposed to be finding, not realizing this was, in fact, a town-hall STYLE debate rather than a debate in a town hall. And this is what happened. In between questions, he took in a steady diet of unicorn blood and Ensure to keep himself awake, energized and looking Voldemortish. By contrast, Obama would talk about hope - something that, to me lately, is the ultimate four letter word.

But here's what I want: I want Johnny Boy's medical records. And I want them now. No more of this posturing or letting reporters read every other word of the reports, or read the reports upside down, or write them in invisible ink and wonder aloud at why the fourth estate can't seem to piece together whether or not McCain is now more machine than man. I want the records and I want them now. Why? So that I can know what state of health he is in and thus make an informed election choice? No. Not even by a long shot. Just because I want to see if he's taking Viagra, and I want the fact that he no-doubt-about-it (Cindy McCain wants it. She needs it. She must have it.) is popping those things like M&Ms reported at the top of the hour.

"This just in, McCain did not have any major gaffes last night, but a lack of boners apparently isn't a problem. This... is the Situation Room."

Here's a funny anecdote, relating to Johnny POW's health, that shows what a jerkoff he truly is:

McCain bristles when it is suggested that he might lack youthful vigor. Early in the primaries, he faced a blunt question from a New Hampshire teenager. Was he worried he would get Alzheimer's disease or die in office? "I'm very active," McCain shot back. "People will judge by the vigor and enthusiasm associated with our campaign. I've out-campaigned my opponents, every race I've ever been in." He ended with a joke. "Thanks for the question, you little jerk!"

Ah, jerk indeed. One more thing... McCain was shot down something like four times while in the service. In like two years or thereabouts. Does that make him an American hero, or a shitty pilot?


Lyin' Snakes on a Plane: Sarah Rocks the Rear!

Uh oh - Palin got off her leash and is milling about the back of the Straight Talk Air Express, pallin' around with the reporters, you know, Joe Six-Packs and Hockey Moms, not answerin' questions like you daggonit want me too also on that, a consummate maverick, a real maverick, gonna talk on that.

Here's a snippet from Governor Palin's press "avail" (not an announced press conference, but an impromptu visit by the Governor to the tail section of the aircraft where the "mainstream media elite" grovel for food scraps, mouth wash and bemoan their lack of access). Six weeks since her nomination and this is her first quasi-unscripted encounter with the press corps.

And, much to my delight, the unbridled She-Bush was in fine form.
On the Ayers-Obama connection, Palin prays for a "Deep Throat" to pull the lid off . . . er . . . . "friendswithterroristsgate" (what do you want, people! The McCain spinmeisters are running on fumes. The second choice was "BarackhusseinObamadoesterroristfistbumpswithsixtiesbombersgate." It was discarded as prolix):

There were times when I was playing vice presidential candidate where I felt . . . retarded. Like really retarded. In a weird way I had to sort of just free myself up to believe that is was ok to be stupid or dumb.

QUESTION: Governor, on the William Ayers issue, you've been bringing it up a lot. I'm curious, why do you think it's a pertinent argument to make right now? It was a long time ago, why is it pertinent?

A: It is pertinent, it's important because when you consider Barack Obama's reaction to and explanation to his association there, and without him being clear at all on what he knew and when he knew it, that I think kinda peaks into his ability to tell us the truth on, not only on association but perhaps other things also. So, it's relevant, I believe, and I brought it up in response to the New York Times article having been printed recently, and I think it just makes us ask the question that, if there's not forthrightness there, with that association and what was known and when it was known, does that lead us to ask, is there forthrightness with the plans Barack Obama has or say tax cuts, or spending increases, makes us question judgment. And I think it's fair and relevant.

QUESTION: (FOX) Are you going to continue to link Obama to Ayers with all of the economic problems going on?

A: Well, Americans are caring about the problems in the economy of course And wanting to know what those long term solutions are that our ticket can provide and what the other ticket is proposing so when you talk though about what it is that we are proposing and what it is that Barack Obama is proposing again it is relevant to connect that association that he has with Ayers--not so much he as a person Ayers, but the whole situation and the truthfulness and the judgment there that you must question if again he's not being forthright in all of his answers as to how did you know him, when did you know him, why would you continue to be associated with him!? It makes you wonder about the forthrightedness, the truthfulness of the plans that he is telling America in regards to the economic recovery because that is first and foremost on American's minds."

I'm neither a grammar Nazi, nor critical of most syntactical gaffes or dubious sentence structuring, but this woman positively mangles English. I think she's declared war on English. Either you are with her or you're with English. English: Wanted! - Dead or Alive. We will fight English over there, so English will not attack us over here.

All of us are dumber for having to endure these two months with Palin. I'm frankly glad she is cordoned off from the media so the American people are immunized from her contagion of stupidity. "Forthrightedness"????? For the love of elocution, c'mon Palin: "You went full retard. You never go full retard!"

One more savory nugget from the She-Bush (though this sobriquet may unfairly deride GW I must astonishingly admit). Responding to a question about her husband, Todd Palin (aka, the "first dude" as Greta affectionately gushes again and again, then again), agreeing to testify with respect to the Governor's allegedly improper removal of former Public Safety Commissioner Walter Monegan:

QUESTION: (NBC) Why did your husband decide to change his mind and return to Alaska and testify?

A: He's always been an open book about this whole Tasergate issue, wanting to speak with investigators, wanting to speak and is with attorneys, everybody involved. The personnel board in the state of Alaska is that board tasked with dealing with any issue involving the governor, the lieutenant governor, or the attorney general.

What the investigation turned into, led by a Senate Democrat, has been kind of a goat rope, a very partisan and very controversial type of investigation. The personnel board Todd's corroborating with, as long as all the other employees too have an opportunity to cooperate with.

It's an open book. Nobody has anything to hide. Nobody's done anything wrong. My choice, and my responsibility to replace a cabinet member, an at-will exempt political appointment whom I did replace, because his strengths were in other areas. It wasn't in running an entire department. There was some, some duties there that he was not able to fulfill.
So my choice, my responsibility had nothing to do with my husband or any of my staff members asking a guy to step aside and take another job, and he didn't want to take that other job.

In fairness, this is a relatively coherent response and only a true master of winsome folksiness can drop a Cracker Barrel Old Country Store and Restaurant idiom like "goat rope" and make you feel just cheery about political corruption and improper influence. Had to see what the web yields on "goat rope." Ah, "a situation that has become completely f**ked up."

Understood Sarah. Let's hope this Republican goat rope severs on November 4.

And to quote some more down-home, firepit-cooking wisdom: Sarah, you couldn't pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were written on the heel.

Posted by Warm Apple Pie.

Tell us a story, Grandpa

The most puzzling moment in last night's presidential debate came up in Senator McCain's supposed strong-suit melieu, foreign policy. In response to Senator Obama's remarks about pursuing Osama bin Laden aggressively in Pakistan, should we have actionable intelligence that the Pakistanis were unable or unwilling to act on, the Distinguished Gentleman from the great state of Arizona stated the following: "I'll get Osama bin Laden, my friends. I know how to get him. I know how to do it."

A question for the Distinguished Senator, if I may: John (may I call you "John?") if you know how to get him, isn't this the type of information that would be helpful to share? Maybe with the military? Maybe with the President? If you currently know how to get him, shouldn't you "put your country first," as you like to say, and maybe, you know, tell someone how? Just a thought.

And maybe it's just me, but I found last night's sotto voce McCain to be far creepier than regular McCain. Anyone?

McCain Does the Pop n' Lock

Back when we were kids, my friend's father thought it would be a great idea to buy him the Alphonso Ribeiro "Breakin' and Poppin'" instructional video (with complimentary cardboard dance mat). His dad would then rouse him out of bed when he had company, announce that he had been "taking dance lessons" and force him to dance "like the kid dressed as Michael Jackson." My buddy was a horrible breakdancer, and having to perform in his Muppet Babies pajamas didn't help. Everyone watching knew he was a terrible dancer. Except his dad. People would cringe while his pops would grin and enjoy. The truth was that there was a perception gap - his dad was simply seeing what he wanted to see, and not what was happening.

A similar perception gap was evident in the pundits' fawning over McCain's performance in last night's debate. McCain "was in his element," "looked comfortable" and "performed splendidly in a format that benefited him." Either the pundits were just seeing what they wanted to see, or they have a Palinesque inability to deviate from the comments they prepared before the debate started. Simply put, McCain looked old and stiff (not in a Starbursts kind of way). His jokes fell flat. When Obama was speaking, McCain wandered aimlessly around the stage like someone looking for the correct gate at Penn Station. I swear he took at least three standing naps. The physical contrast between the two candidates was striking. If this is McCain's idea of being comfortable, then he must also love cuddling up next to Cindy in an asbestos blanket on a bed of nails.

It was clear to me that the pundits had bought into the "McCain is a town hall debator" meme before the night began, and simply saw what they wanted to see in order to fulfill their expectations.

Then again, maybe I was just seeing what I wanted to see.

Democrats Show Scrap?!?! Check. Moon Turns Blood Red? Check.

The Democrats are circling the wagons like it's 1996. Since when does the antiseptic partisan Left have any spunk. Wow.

You better have a whole Michael Vick compound of lipsticked pitbulls, Republicans. Folks are willing to "throw" on this one.

Posted by Warm Apple Pie.

Andrew Sullivan: Time of Death for the Debate (Perhaps the Election) at 10:33 EST

"10.33 pm. This was, I think, a mauling: a devastating and possibly electorally fatal debate for McCain. Even on Russia, he sounded a little out of it. I've watched a lot of debates and participated in many. I love debate and was trained as a boy in the British system to be a debater. I debated dozens of times at Oxofrd. All I can say is that, simply on terms of substance, clarity, empathy, style and authority, this has not just been an Obama victory. It has been a wipe-out.It has been about as big a wipe-out as I can remember in a presidential debate. It reminds me of the 1992 Clinton-Perot-Bush debate. I don't really see how the McCain campaign survives this."

Comment: A "mauling" might be a bit of hyperbole, but I'm not far from it - an unequivocal victory for Obama tonight.

Posted by Warm Apple Pie.

The Rot From Within: Conservatives Lose Faith

Responses to tonight's debate from Michelle Malkin's readers (ie., the already counted Republican votes on November 4).

From Malkin reader "Danny":

"Sorry to say - during tonight’s debate - all I had to hear was: (1) McCain offer additional housing bailouts in response to the 1st question and, (2) a dedicated lack of confrontation in response to (a) Obama’s ‘Bush = McCain’ rhetoric and, (b) lack of willingness to drive a stake into Fannie Mae + Franklin Gaines + Obama & Democrats - that I had to fight myself from turning the TV off.
Clearly - the wrong Republican on the ticket was out there tonight.

In love with a lipsticked pig???? ahahhahahaha. Wait till I tell the boys in marketing!

What about all of McCain’s talk about “victory”? It matters in Iraq, but not in Michigan, not in tonight’s debate?

Gov Palin sounds like more of the leader I am looking for - not someone to call me “friend” - but someone to show me some fight. If I feel this way - I wonder what our servicemen and servicewomen in Iraq and Afghanistan will think about when they see this performance and truly study it with a critical eye?

Take the gloves off - and put on the brass knuckles.

I will still vote for the McCain-Palin ticket - but only because Gov Palin is on it. Truly, I feel sorry for her. At least she FIGHTS. Sen. McCain’s performance tonight was more like Captain Hazelwood of the Exxon Valdez - playing slalom with icebergs."

Comment: Wow, if Palin "sounds like more of the leader you are looking for," not only do I worry about this election if I'm an ardent conservative, but with more exigency the future of the Republican party. "In what respect, Charlie?" In respect to the general neocon "escape-to-the-exits" and the separation of the varied constituencies under the so-called "big tent."

Uh oh: Another lost soul:

"We are four weeks until the Election and the only one speaking the Truth about Obama is Sarah Palin. McCain isn’t getting his message out thru the Treason Media’s filters. Obama’s ACORN cronies are rounding up homeless people to commit voter fraud in Ohio already. With conservatives already leery of McCain and only staying interested because of patriotism and Palin, the longer he shuffles along, the more likely this “imperfect servant’s” last public act will be to deliver the United States into the hands of the fascists and communists that he once fought against and suffered under. I wonder if he even knows how badly he is failing - not only himself, but his country?"

Comment: "Saying goodbye, why is it sad? Makes the country remember the absolutely f**ked up times it had - Iraq, torture, political firings at the justice department, Katrina, subprime meltdown, wiretapping, prescription drug bill, economic "stimulus" checks, September 11, Harriet Miers, "Mission Accomplished," Afghanistan. You're in my heart, so until January 20th. It's time for saying goodbye."
I feel dirty behaving like the liberal ideologues around me (Defective Pants), but something about it feels good right now. Trust me - you give me more personal freedom, lower taxes matched with lower government spending, a renewed interest in building a streamlined military relying on technology, a determined space program and an emphasis on quasi-privatization of entitlements done the right way, my personal pendulum will swing towards the middle once again.

But not this cycle.

Posted by Warm Apple Pie

Classy Enough to Leave Him at the Footstep of the Woodshed - Round 2 All Obama

I was hyper-critical of Senator Obama's performance during the first debate at Ole' Miss. He was diffident, impassive and projected an "aw shucks, don't say that" vibe that infuriated me and must have trigger unhinged bellicosity in the true believers of liberalism. He was playing "not to lose" - a tremulous, pussy-footing performance.

Not tonight.

And probably not for the rest of this election.

Barack Obama was downright presidential this evening. John McCain was a spent force eight years removed from the window's closing. A loyal soldier who served his country for 70 years, but retired in 2006. Please go with grace.

We can debate nuances until the bovine, partisan cows come home. That's not what tonight was about, suprisingly - not the issues. It was about appearances. And, strangely, for the first time since President Clinton, a Democrat - a wonderful Democrat, his smile, oh that smile, did he just wink at me, oh my god, there are the little starbursts in my living room, I'm mesmerized, I am definitely sitting up straighter on my couch. Does this make me gay? - DAMMIT LOWRY, GIVE ME BACK MY KEYBOARD. GO BACK TO THE NATIONAL REVIEW AND ATTEND TO THE LAST SHRED OF ITS DIGNITY. Barry Goldwater has placed a coffin above his own coffin and Ronald Reagan's coffin. By the end of this thing, lots of coffins to go around. A funeral pyre for Karl Rove would be a nice closing ceremony.

As I was saying, a Democrat looked like next year's prototype, rakish and cherry, right off the factory line. The new model. The crusty, starchy Republican was a refurbished product, a collection of misfit parts, held together by spit and glue and the faint whiff of 20th Century cognition.

Obama sat there casually. Casually confident. And the "straight talk" express blew a tire and desperately needed a figurative and literal oil change (please see the previous post). The message was stale and message is king in presidential elections. The scuttlebutt is that Palin tried to storm the set with a life-sized poster of Bill Ayers, but secret service confused her for Cindy Sheehan and used the taser.

And you could smell the fear on the right-wing pundits in the post game. They see it slipping away. The Republican fembot on ABC conceded McCain didn't score "the knockout blow" or submit "the game changer." Yeah, no kidding. Even the conservative assassins on FoxNews tonight adopted a defeatist air. Glenn Beck, the very foundation of Goldwater's revolution, could only offer "we don't mind losing, but at least we want to lose fair" in the wake of McCain's lackluster turn and voter fraud allegations in Ohio from the RNC (losing like the Detroit Pistons in the 1990 Eastern Conference finals I see - not even shaking hands, walking off the court with time left in the fourth).

Voter fraud - we have no comment. But I (unlike some) can name a Supreme Court case: Bush v. Gore.

Let me remind you this playful parry comes from a registered independent. Check the rolls. I voted Nader in 2000 and Badnarek (be still my Libertarian heart) in 2004.

As things stand at 10:13 pm PST, I will vote for Barack Obama for President of the United States of American on November 4.

The man and his core beliefs are certainly big factors, but more so: I vote for the future. I vote for my family (my girlfriend now 10 weeks pregnant). I vote for the former glory of America and may it return as the erstwhile beacon of light that guided a world. I vote for tolerance, intelligence and foresight.

Unbelievably, without a scintilla of mockery or hyperbole (can't believe I'm saying it) - I vote for CHANGE WE CAN BELIEVE IN.

Who am I voting for you ask?

"That one." Thanks for pointing him out, John McCain.
Posted by Warm Apple Pie.

Dr. McCain

"I'm cool. I'm with it. I've got a healthcare plan. Tucka, tucka, tucka, tucka, tucka, uh. Well don't look at me like I'm freakin that guy, give your Senator a hug."
(hat tip to Beeker)

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Obama Must Answer For Ayers, Then McCain Should Apologize To America

From Andrew Sullivan and his political blog, The Daily Dish at The Atlantic:

"The far right is obsessed with the question of Bill Ayers, much more obsessed than with the war in Iraq or Afghanistan or the Palin farce or the financial meltdown. Their obsession is unseemly but it is not, alas, without any basis in truth. I find Bill Ayers' refusal to disown his use of political violence in the 1960s to be repulsive. If I were forced to meet him, I would not shake his hand. Obama's fault, however, is not being a terrorist sympathizer, as Palin absurdly declares to mob cheers. Obama's fault is in being a go-along-to-get-along Hyde Park liberal. You can see why he made the decision not to wreck polite liberal society in Chicago by calling out these former thugs. But I do not admire him for it. It's a corner he cut. He deserves to be criticized for it - if not in the fascistic way Hannity does it.But the question of association raises broader questions."

Fair point by Sullivan. I too deem Obama's association with William Ayers worthy of discussion and in season - not because by hypothetical syllogism Obama approves of terrorism and violent means of protest (ie., Obama is to Ayers, Ayers is to terrorism = Obama is to terrorism), but as a reasonable question of his judgment as a public servant. It isn't guilt by association, but uncertainty by association. There would be no tenable smoke here if Ayers had peacefully protested and railed against the sixties establishment, or took it as far as non-violent civil disobedience. However, he made bombs and detonated them. That's terrorism by any definition and Obama shook the guy's hand, unwittingly in the beginning perhaps, but then with a full understanding and appreciation of Ayer's nihilistic past. Obama's surrogates must do more than mewl "smear tactics" and clumsily attempt to dismiss the connection out-of-hand (the "40 years ago and I was eight when Ayers committed these despicable acts" is almost Palinesque in its fumbling diversion).

Notwithstanding the Democratic dance here, the premediated methodology by which McCain-Palin uses the Ayers-Obama connection is the most abhorrent aspect to all this back-and-forth partisan rancor: Simply to engendered hatred/fear of Obama as a radical, a terrorist sympathizer, a dangerous appeaser of leftist criminal syndicalism and anarchy, or, hell, maybe even a "suspicious black fella" (whatever shoe fits for McCain to help undecideds make the "right" decision on November 4). This is dirty pool (or politics as a "tough business" as McCain offered on The View) and jettisons from the realm of legitimate political discourse. It's nothing more then slimy "politics as usual" in an election cycle climaxing in expected baseness.

posted by Warm Apple Pie