Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Piss hands: Not just for ball players anymore

Newly re-crowned WBC heavyweight champion Vitaly "Dr. Ironfist" Klitschko had some swelling in his massive hands after beating Nigerian Nightmare Samuel Peter by TKO on Saturday. How did he treat the swelling, you ask? He wrapped his hands in his son's wet, urine-soaked diapers, of course!

"I wrap nappies filled with my three-year-old son Max's wee around my fists," he said, adding he got the idea from his grandmother. "The nappies hold the liquid and the swelling stays down."

Avid baseball fans have been regaled for years by winsome tales of favorite ballplayers pissing on their own hands during spring training to harden them for a season of baseball. The players known for doing this are almost exclusively the same few players who don't wear batting gloves during games and rely instead on their well-calloused piss-hands. Moises Alou and Jorge Posada are prime examples, though I'd hazard a guess that Manny Ramirez pees on his hands too, but probably just for fun.

Yay wee wee!

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