Assassination Of Liberalism By The Coward Dennis Miller

"I don't mean to go on a rant, folks, but . . . "

Highfalutin, GOP nozzle Dennis Miller says Sarah Palin is a "great dame." He regards the appearance of the good-looking Governor's "great sex life" as the source of bile coming Palin's way courtesy of a coterie of left-leaning ice queens, presiding over cold, dour lives and marriages according to Miller, in the oppressive chasteness of Manhattan's Upper East Side.

Then, guaranteeing the homely vision of his unkempt, watery-fat, ape face will dispel any notion of giving the missus a proper pickle-tickle this evening, Miller brings Todd Palin's snow machine into his sordid allegory, commenting that it has the look of "mechanized foreplay," a precursor to Alaska's first couple's exchange of bodily fluids most likely.

In Miller's wacky, German scat-porn body politic, that's why Sarah Palin fascinates the folks: the ability to have "non-neurotic sex" with her strapping Tesoro Iron Dog champion, as Monday Night Football's worst anchor phrases it.

So there you have it, Republicans: Your new standard-bearer instills such wonderment (such "starbursts around the living room") simply because she'll opt for the receiving end of a "Cleveland Steamer" without regret, guilt or therapy in its malodorous wake.

Miller, put the little monster away - the Palins ain't in the market for scruffy, irascible three-way. And that goes for the rest of you conservative cattle-rapers: get the grand old elephant's trunk out of Sarah's face. Show some class. Pretend that she's smart and sexy. That goes for you too, Greta. Christ, will someone get Greta's tongue out of the Governor's ear?

Who needs sexist attacks from the left with hyper-sexist flattery from the right? Sarah, I'd avoid back rooms of dive bars with any combination of Rich Lowry, Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Bill Kristol, Dennis Miller and/or Hugh Hewitt throwing back Jaeger Bombs. Get away from that pinball table, Sarah!

I just love watching Miller huff and puff in a vain, awkward effort to ingratiate himself with a confused Republican audience. You're playing to the wrong crowd, Dennis. They don't get you. They don't particularly like you either.

You want an arcane cultural reference that resonates for no one, but I'll use it anyway and not be funny? After 9-11, Miller dumped liberalism for neoconservatism quicker than Vidkun Quisling traded in Norway for Nazism at Oslo's NRK studios in April 9, 1940. You got that, babe?

Let me give you the Dennis Miller transformational chronology from pedant to pussy in the flash of a fireball:

September 10, 2001: Miller loves pot, strippers, whores, gays, blacks, books, college radio, cynicism, polysyllabic rants - a "left-leaning, Dada-ist wisenheimer"according to Slate's Dennis Cass.

September 11, 2001: Terrorists attack New York City and Washington D.C. - the prime fronts of Al Qaeda's war to rid the world of asexual, frigid liberal women.

September 12, 2001: Miller curls up in the fetal position, shrinks in fear, plays tiddlywinks with his spontaneously combusted, new found chicken-hawk vinny, pretends to hate pot, strippers, whores, gays, blacks, books, college radio and cynicism. Still goes on windy polysyllabic rants, this time annoying Real Americans and raining down a torrent of canceled, unwatchable cable talk shows and failed game show pilots - a "tell-it-like-it-is right-wing blowhard" according to Slate's Dennis Cass.

September 13, 2001: Terrorists declare victory over GOP infant Miller, still cowering in the corner of the room with a wet diaper and a baby's intellect - a.k.a an unflinching Republican soldier.

For good measure, Jack Knowledge has to get his licks in on Miller, like Fred O'Bannion laying the lumber, giving the good wood, to Mitchy Kramer:

"Know when you can tell someone could really use a good cockslap? When they manage to make Bill O'Reilly seem somewhat less douchey by comparison. We salute you Dennis Miller, you skid mark on the underpants of society."

The days of the great Dennis Miller Live on HBO are long gone.

"Of course . . . that's just The Potatoe's opinion . . . we could be wrong."

***UPDATE***: Newshounds adds its two cents on Miller's peculiar bit on The O'Reilly Factor:

Comment: Words fail me – actually two words, directed to Miller come to mind. Miller’s commentary was as offensive as that of National Review's Kevin Burke who claimed that liberal women hated Palin because they felt guilty about their abortions and because Palin chose to give birth to a Down’s baby – views shared by Fox’s Bill O’Reilly and Charles Krauthammer.

To those males, who claim to channel what liberal women think, I say STFU. As I noted on an earlier thread, liberal women do not begrudge Palin her choice – a choice which Palin would deny to other women. As I also noted, there are other issues, important to women, which Palin either ignored or was uninterested in. But what was really, really creepy (and offensive) was Miller’s fantasizing about Palin’s sex life. It sounds like Dennis Miller, rather than East Side liberal women, has some – ah – problems? And snowmobile as “foreplay” – whatever gets you through the night, Dennis!

All I can say is that one of my best friends is a working mom with four children. I don’t know about her sex life (and don't want to know). What I do know is that she gets very tired. Obviously, I am not a Sarah Palin fan; but Miller's little screed was insulting to her because it revealed that Miller’s admiration is based on her “sexuality” (ability to please her man) and not on her ability to combine a political career with raising a family which includes a child with special needs. And that is very sexist!

Greta, Miller, Lowry, etc. - GOP admiration for Palin has become disturbingly fetishistic. I'm starting to worry about her safety.

I began drafting a "funny" take on that scene from The Accused starring the neocon usual suspects, but better judgment prevailed and I abandoned the project when I envisioned Hannity doing a jig atop a bar table, cruelly ribbing a reluctant Colmes to "get that college ass ready. You're up next, college boy. I want to see that college ass work" as Rush Limbaugh and Fred Barnes held Governor Palin down on the pinball table, while . . . (swallow vomit) . . . Greta thrusted in and out between the helpless Sarah's spread legs, climaxing with an orgasm face.

I feel awful about myself right now. Bad baby, bad baby, GOP!

Gretawatch: The Lantern-Jawed Banshee Continues To Stalk Palin

Greta continues to shill for Governor Palin, declaring her "the front runner" for the Republican Presidential nomination in 2012. Interviewing a local Miami journalist about the Republican Governors Association conference this week (or, as Greta puts it, Sarah Palin's vetting process meet-n-greet for vice presidential hopefuls), Van Susteren and her lantern jaw gushed over Palin's big reception by the media covering her very first presser . . . um . . . eight days after the election. She fielded four questions, responding at times, unexpectedly, with a smattering of words. Still, sentences were conspicuously absent.

Staying fair and balanced, I cannot report that Greta verbally acknowledged her sapphic tendencies when she interacts with the Saracuda, but draw your own conclusions from wearing Palin's panties on her face during the entire broadcast of Friday's On The Record. I found it telling.

By the way, if Greta calls Todd Palin "the first dude" one more time I'm going to rip my clothes off and hug the sun:



***UPDATE***: Greta is a Scientologist. I'm just saying. Keep her away from couches, Oprah and questions about her feelings for Palin.

Palin As President . . .

Nice. Got a grin out of me.

"Soul Fixers" To The Left Of Me, "Healers" To The Right

One of Michelle Malkin's compassionate and tolerant readers reminds us that lost in the California Proposition 8 furor is Christian benevolence:

Palmdale resident James Jackson, a member of the Church of Latter-day Saints who gave $1,000 to the Proposition 8 campaign, said he felt that the good works of his church had been forgotten in the midst of attention on the protests about the vote.

“I’m not a bigot,” said Jackson, 48. “I want to be a good person. But there are certain things I just don’t believe are right.”

Malkin welcomes Mr. Jackson into her elite group of "soul fixers" and "healers" fighting to defend "marriage."

Asked for comment on the developments of the past week, marriage snorted "personally, I think Mr. Jackson's a raging bigot. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a whole slate of divorces to get eviscerated by today, most featuring infidelity. I'm pretty pumped!"

With absolutely no respect, Mr. Jackson: you are a bigot. If you want to be a good person, then let me show you the way - stop donating money to bigoted causes that press bigoted propositions into law.

I have a lot of personal predilections towards things I "believe are right." But if they prevent a free, adult American citizen from enjoying a right endowed to me simply because I like the ladies, then I put my wallet away and save my hard-earned dough for my family. You know, so the economic turbulence doesn't jeopardize the sanctity of my marriage when suddenly we cannot make ends meet.

I'm constantly amazed how many supposed Christians refuse to behave in a Christ-like manner. You see Jesus Christ in a grilled cheese sandwich or on a set of drapes, yet you cannot find him in yourselves.

As for the protesters this weekend, I urge restraint and a public airing of the pathos of your unfortunate situation. Progress will win. Equal rights will prevail. The bigot class will die out. Bide your time. Show your love trumps their sanctimony, and you will win the day.

Memory Refresher: Dick Morris

Lest we forget:

On August 29, 1996, Morris resigned from the Clinton campaign after reports surfaced that he had been involved with a prostitute. A tabloid newspaper had obtained and published a set of photographs of Morris and the woman on a Washington, D.C., hotel balcony. The Electronic Telegraph reported unverified claims that in order to impress the woman, Sherry Rowlands, Morris invited her to listen in on conversations with the President. The Telegraph also alleged that Morris had a preference for "toe-sucking and dominance," and that he regaled Rowlands with a version of "Popeye the Sailor Man," performed in his underpants.

Morris resigned on the same day that Bill Clinton spoke and accepted the nomination at the Democratic National Convention. In his resignation statement, he said that "while I served I sought to avoid the limelight because I did not want to become the message. Now, I resign so I will not become the issue." In his response, President Clinton praised Morris as a "friend" and thanked him for his years of service.

Morris was featured on two consecutive covers of Time magazine. The September 2, 1996 issue, which was released before the prostitute story broke, featured Morris as "The Man Who Has Clinton's Ear." The following week, the cover featured Morris and his wife, Eileen McGann, and the headline read "The Morris Mess: After the Fall."

Bad enough Dennis Miller's funky visage disturbs my sexual fantasies this Friday evening, now I've got to contend with the tubby phantasm of a banana-hammocked Dick Morris bragging he's "good to the finish, cause I eats me spinach."

No nookie tonight! Damn you Wikipedia.

Miss Precious Perfect

For you, Jack Knowledge. Affleck embodies the globe-headed diva.

U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops Speaks; Reminds Me They're Lunatics

So, President-Elect Obama has not even taken office yet and he's getting threats from religious groups - play nice or else. The U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops, or NAMBLA for short, has issued a statement. And it wasn't exactly a statement of unabashed congratulations.

The statement...also state[s] that the election was not a referendum on abortion, and will suggest that aggressive abortion-rights polices "would alienate many Americans and be interpreted by many Catholics as an attack on the Church."

An attack on the Catholic Church, you say? Good to know that when your little Papalist sewing circle comes together, you guys don't take things overly personally. But the insanity continues...

"Any one of us here would consider it a privilege to die tomorrow--die tomorrow!--to bring about the end of abortion," Auxiliary Bishop Robert Hermann of St. Louis said during a press conference at the Bishops’ conference in Baltimore.

Good thing we go hunting for religious extremists in Tikrit. They're so hard to find here in America. They're hiding in plain sight - in Baltimore. Although, to be fair, you can send the Army and the National Guard to Anwar Province, but they'll be damned if they're traipsing into the Inner Harbor or Towson. That city is a shithole, yo.

But Bishop Joseph Martino offered a sinister message to the new administration. Martino runs the Popa Nostra in Scranton, PA - and he had a message for Lunchpail Joe Biden: you're pro-choice, then don't come 'round here no mo'.

"I cannot have the vice president coming to Scranton and saying he learned his values there when those values are utterly against those of the Catholic Church," Martino said.

As I had always suspected, the Catholic Church runs Scranton - and with an iron fist, no less. As Bishop Martino makes clear, if you learned your values in Scranton, you learned them from the Catholic Church. Period. Joe Biden is Roman Catholic and grew up in Scranton. Thus, everything Joe Biden knows from his time in Scranton came from the Roman Catholic church. There is simply no possible way that Senator/VP-Elect Biden could have learned something somewhere other than in his pew on Sunday. Frankly, I'm not even sure why he bothered to go to school Monday through Friday. In Scranton, Sunday is the only day that matters where it comes to learning your life-lessons.

Just another message from Crazytown, USA. Peace be with you, and also with you. Go in peace to love and serve the Lord.

(NOTE: Perhaps Bishop Martino should simply be happy to see one of his own back in the White House, seeing as how Mr. Biden is the first Catholic ever elected to serve as Vice President. You don't see the Muslims dumping on Senator Obama, do you???)

*****UPDATE*****

An assist to DP on this one, but apparently in Greenville, South Carolina, if you attend St. Mary's Catholic Church and you voted for Obama, you have some explaining to do. To God, that is.

The priest at St. Mary's Catholic Church in downtown Greenville has told parishioners that those who voted for Barack Obama placed themselves under divine judgment because of his stance on abortion and shouldn't receive Holy Communion until they've done penance.

That sounds to me like any Catholic who voted for O is on the outs with the Trinity. So it must be a small number, right? I mean, even though his running mate was a Catholic, the abortion thing must have been a deal-breaker for all those Papalists out there, right?

At issue for the church locally and nationwide are exit polls showing 54 percent of self-described Catholics voted for Obama, as well as a growing rift in the lifestyle and voting patterns between practicing and non-practicing Catholics.

D'oh! Good thing they didn't call their parishioners who voted Democratic evil or anything though. Kept it respectful-like...

In a letter posted on St. Mary's Web site, Newman wrote that "voting for a pro-abortion politician when a plausible pro-life alternative exists constitutes material cooperation with intrinsic evil."

But Reverend Newman goes on, and I can't even tell you, it's a screamer. I can't upstage the man - let's Warner Wolf it. To the videotape:

Newman calls abortion the "chief battleground" in the so-called culture wars, and different from "prudential" matters such as health care, education or the war on terror. A Catholic who gets an abortion, encourages one or assists in the procedure is automatically excommunicated from the church, Newman said, a penalty he said doesn't apply to other forms of killing.

Now, I want to make sure I read this right: Let's say my mother, a practicing Catholic, drives someone - let's say they're a cracked-out former student who comes to her for help - to the doctor where that woman intends to and then gets an abortion. This would be, arguably, encouraging an abortion. According to Reverend Newman, my mother, who has attended church virtually every week of her life and is actually a real-life believer in the faith (not many of those around these days), worked with handicapped and mentally disabled children as a profession, and - unlike I would wager Reverend Newman - has actually met a Pope, is automatically excommunicated by the Church. However, conversely, let's say she gets tired of my father chewing with his mouth open (which, let's be honest, the whole family is pretty tired of) and stabs him to death with a kitchen knife... she is not automatically excommunicated. She might be, but not a dispositive act. That's what you're saying here? That's what you're selling me? That's the blue plate special today?

Seriously?

Nope, I have nothing else. I'm finished. Turn out the lights when you leave.

(note: I try to avoid bringing my mother into things, but she's a very good example of a practicing, faithful and non-lapsed Catholic who also happens to have a functional brain. Reverend Newman, not as much.)

Shame on you, Sir, and by "you" I mean YOU

Now don't take this the wrong way, but MSNBC's Keith Olbermann has been paying very close attention to you and your actions lately and, suffice it to say, he's not impressed. In fact, he's had it up to here with you and your crap. He's even taken the time to devote a Special Comment to you. Just take it like a man and move on. If you complain you'll just be feeding the news cycle with more fodder. And frankly, you're going to need to have a thicker skin if you want to make it in politics.

Now take your scolding like a man. As we British say, "chin up. Stiff upper lip. Pip pip and all that." Of course, we also pronounce laboratory as "la-bore-a-tree," so maybe you shouldn't listen to us anyway.



Courtesy of our friends at 23/6.

Warm Apple Pie Calls It! Hillary Cometh!

Not to toot my own horn, but I'm tooting it! I called this nugget two weeks ago: The Associated Press reports Hillary Clinton is being tapped as President-Elect Obama's Secretary of State.

A cagey, astute move by Obama if the story pans out. Absolutely perfect role for Hillary and her Sisterhood of the Traveling Pantsuits. She's earned the post.

Joe the Plumber Starts Website; Charges for Freedom

Protector of all things freedomish and toilety, Joe the Plumber has got his own website up and running here. There appears to be a movement afoot - a movement to "help[] one another in times of need." Sounds socialist! Say it ain't so, Joe! But rest assured, he's just trying to lead the "backbone" of our country (I could have sworn it was the plumber's crack) to freedom. But there's a catch - freedom isn't free. In fact, it's $14.95 for a 1-year membership.

What type of freedom does your hard-earned $14.95 get you? Let's see:

1) Total Access to "Joe The Forum" where you may chat directly with Joe (freedom of speech)
2) Subscription to the "Joe The Blog" monthly newsletter (freedom of the press)
3) Free Shipping on all "Joe The Plumber" merchandise (free market economy)
4) Free Signed Copy of Joe's forthcoming book "Joe The Plumber" - Fighting for the American Dream (Paperback slated for release December 1, 2008) (free plumbing tips?)
5) Become an integral part of an American movement to restore our government to the people (a brain aneurysm, which will require the free health care that Joe opposes)

Godspeed you plunging warrior.

McCain Advisor a Hoax: Palin Still May Not Know Africa is Continent

According to The New York Times, one of the most blogged about tidbits leaked from the McCain campaign in the aftermath of the election was nothing more than a piece of an elaborate hoax. When FoxNews quoted an unnamed McCain advisor as stating that Palin did not know that Africa was a continent, the blogosphere exploded with bellowing laughter, and the traditional media followed suit. This blog took the bait as well.

On Monday, MSNBC's David Shuster revealed that the unnamed McCain advisor was none other than Martin Eisenstadt. Trouble is, Martin Eisenstadt doesn't exist.

Look, I'm not going to bore you with all the details (which you can read here), but this is awesome, hilarious and somewhat embarrassing. The guys who perpetrated this hoax created a fake think tank for "Eisenstadt" to work at as a senior fellow, the Harding Institute, created a blog for him to blog on, created youtube videos purporting to show him being interviewed on Iraqi tv, and the list goes on and on. This was elaborate. This was genius. And this was a load of bullshit. Well played.

***UPDATE*** In the most-meta moment we can recall, the hoaxy Martin Eisenstadt, who doesn't actually exist, claims on his blog that yesterday's expose in the NY Times (link above) was the actual hoax, perpetrated by the group Yes Men, who put out a very realistic uber-liberal faux NY Times from the future yesterday. To sum up, the hoax is suggesting that the hoax is reality and the real expose is the actual hoax. Get all that? Check it out here. See Valley Wag's take on the story here.

National Enquirer Shocker? Cindy Redistributes Her Saliva?

The National Enquirer reports Cindy McCain has been canoodling with another Maverick. And they have a money shot from April 2006 at the Tempe Music Festival with Cindy probing her paramour's back molars with her lizard tongue.

When asked for comment, Sam Joe Wurzelbacher defended, "look, it's not me."

Take it with a grain of salt, but ask John Edwards if he thinks the Enquirer uses credible sources.

If it's true, I like it Cindy! Living like us Fake Americans. Perhaps you're not as bloodless as I thought.

Photo Essay of the Day We Changed For the Better

The future is now.

The "Lantern-Jawed Banshee" Stalks Palin!

All praises due Jack Knowledge for encapsulating Greta Van Susteren's visage in three words.

John Stewart notes Greta's disturbing fixation on the Governor of Alaska towards the end of the clip.

Oh, and here's a portion of Greta's interview with Sarah Palin you did not see "On The Record" because, according to Gretawire, "even two hours . . . wasn't enough for our conversation":



You know, maybe if you allowed the Governor/Homemaker/Real American to disregard the baking tray and stop cooking moose frankfurters for apparently the entire Alaskan National Guard, two hours would have been enough.

The interview concluded with Greta humping Todd Palin's leg as Sarah tried to beat her off with a rolled-up newspaper.

Palin in 2012? Really? Really, Republicans? No, by all means . . .

A Mandate To Loot

Allow me to introduce you to the independent oversight board charged with monitoring the $700 billion bailout.

You want me to appoint some folks, you shiftless Congressional layabouts. You make me sick:

In the six weeks since lawmakers approved the Treasury's massive bailout of financial firms, the government has poured money into the country's largest banks, recruited smaller banks into the program and repeatedly widened its scope to cover yet other types of businesses, from insurers to consumer lenders.

Along the way, the Bush administration has committed $290 billion of the $700 billion rescue package.

Yet for all this activity, no formal action has been taken to fill the independent oversight posts established by Congress when it approved the bailout to prevent corruption and government waste. Nor has the first monitoring report required by lawmakers been completed, though the initial deadline has passed.

So let me get this straight: We now approach 50% of the initial bailout fund - the big block of stinky government cheese - dispatched into the financial markets (and car markets, and insurance markets, and perhaps the credit card markets, I hear Spencer Gifts just received aid to bolster its dwindling lava lamp inventory) without a single overseer appointed, without a single status report filed?

F**k it, let's loot the coffers! "Yeah, no cops!":

Sarah's Long Kiss Goodbye On Television

Vaya con dios tambien, senorita, tu "betchada".

From a Yglesias reader commenting on Sarah Palin's prospects in 2012:

[L]osing VP’s don’t take blame. But their track record post-defeat is abysmal. It’s a sure way to never get elected President, and almost as sure a way to never get your party’s nomination. Here’s a list, pre-Palin:

John Edwards
Joe Lieberman
Jack Kemp
Dan Quayle
Lloyd Bentsen
Geraldine Ferraro
Walter Mondale (and he had already won once)
Bob Dole (here’s an exception - helped out, perhaps, by the fact that no one seems to remember him being Ford’s running mate)
Sergeant Shriver
Edward Muskie
William Miller
Henry Cabot Lodge
Estes Kefauver
John Sparkman
Earl Warren (yeah, he became Chief Justice, but his political career was finished)
John Bricker
Charles McNary
Frank Knox (FDR kindly put him in his cabinet after trouncing him and Landon in 1936)
Charles Curtis
Joseph Robinson (he did become Senate Majority Leader and a key FDR ally after his defeat)Charles W. Bryan (went on to lose his gubernatorial campaign in Nebraska)FDR (big-time exception)
Charles Fairbanks
(went back to practicing law in Indianapolis)
Nicholas Murray Butler
Hiram Johnson (Taft and TR’s veeps, respectively)
John Worth Kern
Henry Gassaway Davis (fun fact - he was 81 when he was nominated to be Vice President. I guess the Dems realized they had no shot at TR)
Adlai Stevenson
Adlai Stevenson’s grandfatherArthur Sewall, a Swedenborgian shipbuilder

So from 1896-2004, losing Vice Presidential nominees went on to be elected President once, and nominated by their party three times.

A veritable "who's who" list of political also-rans, has-been's and never-was's. Perhaps Palin is gearing up to challenge Rachel Ray in 2012 with her indomitable moose stew.

POTATOE BREAKING NEWS: She'll be back!

In a world without alien boundaries...

This film is not yet rated.

November 5, 2012

James Pethokoukis predicts a one-term Obama presidency only negative 63 days into an Obama administration. What happened to the media honeymoon for the first negative 100 days?:

That's right, the "O" in "Obama" may stand for "One Term." For starters, there's a strong chance that when voters head to the polls on Nov. 2, 2010, they likely will still think the economy is awful. Not much debate about that. (Good chance the Democrats' two-election winning streak comes to an end.) And while voters may be somewhat patient for two years, patient for four years? Really unlikely. If history is any guide at all, voters may still be terribly cranky about the economy when they cast their ballots on Nov. 6, 2012 and thus likely choose the 45th president of the United States -- be it Mitt Romney, Sarah Palin, Bobby Jindal or some other Republican without "Bush" for a last name. Once again a "change" election for an impatient America. The same bad economy that doomed John McCain in 2008 will have sunk Obama, as well.

Who can argue with Petho-kook-is? I mean Obama's first week helming the whimsical "Office of the President-Elect" has been an unmitigated disappointment. What pretend legislation has he passed? What dress-rehearsal policy has he put in place? How about appointing some hypothetical judges? I'm not buying this "I'm not the President yet" pretext for inaction. Way to not fix the obvious problem of the potentially improved economy of four years hence.

And another thing: Mitt Romney? Sarah Palin? Bobby Jindal? You mean Tin Man (i.e., stiff joints, no heart, needs oil, "who let the dogs out, woot, woot"), Scarecrow (i.e., babbling mouth, no brain, needs to read all the papers, any of the papers, "in what respect, Charlie"), and the Cowardly Lion (i.e., tremulous intellect, no courage, scared of science, scared of ghosts, likes exorcisms, "I began to think that the demon would only attack me if I tried to pray or fight back")?

Yikes!

In a related story, Barack Obama has been speculatively elected President for a possible second term in the imaginary election that probably didn't occur today. "Don't these haters know that I'm the mutha f**kin' Wizard," a grinning Obama joked at his made up victory rally at a location to be determined.

Still On The Stump, Sarah?

We continue to discuss Vice Presidential loser Sarah Palin because she remains topical, refusing to "give up the ghost," rattling her old campaign chains and haunting the airwaves with her used-up rhetoric. Today on CNN:

BLITZER: Because, you know, during a campaign, every presidential campaign, things are said, it's tough, as you well know, it gets sometimes pretty fierce out there. And during the campaign, you said this, you said: "This is not a man who sees America as you see it and how I see America." And then you went on to say: "Someone who sees America, it seems, as being so imperfect that he is palling around with terrorists who would target their own country."

PALIN: Well, I still am concerned about that association with Bill Ayers. And if anybody still wants to talk about it, I will, because this is an unrepentant domestic terrorist who had campaigned to blow up, to destroy our Pentagon and our U.S. Capitol. That's an association that still bothers me. And I think it's still fair to talk about it. However the campaign is over. That chapter is closed. Now is the time to move on and to, again, make sure that all of us are doing all that we can to progress this nation.

Sigh . . . will someone tell this nitwit she lost the election. Even Quayle got the "hint" in '92 (you know - the hint of election results) and skedaddled. And if you are indeed still campaigning for some conjectural office, then I once again demand your full medical records, presumptive mother of Trig.

As long as you persist, Palin, the Potatoe will continue to hold up the mirror. She who hath not associated . . .

The Fairness of the Fairness Doctrine

Serendipity offers a nice recitation of the battleground's history, but may throw in too quickly with the Democrats' purported desire to thrust fairness on the right-wing radio infrastructure:

For the last two decades, Rush Limbaugh, and his many clones that dominate our airwaves, have grown increasingly bolder in their vilification of opponents. A constant stream of extremist Right Wing propaganda is offered (free-of-charge) 24-7 throughout the frequency range of radio.

In many areas (such as Western Pennsylvania) there is no alternative voice available. Huge conglomerates like Clear Channel and Sinclair Broadcasting have used the powers of monopoly to keep competitors outside of the market. The costs of setting up an operation to rival the corporate media giants are prohibitive. Nutty "conservative" programming runs rough-shod over a vulnerable segment of the populace that is more than willing to accept the lies on offer. Something needs to change, and the "Commons" of the air restored to The People.

I become very nervous when it comes to the exercise of FCC authority and its unwieldy rules and regulations. I become especially nervous when the FCC starts to take exception with the content of certain messages, backed by a frothing mad Democratic Congress eager to settle some old scores.

If there is a demand for liberal voices, such demand will ultimately drive the marketplace. If Clear Channel could make more bucks showcasing Randi Rhodes rather than Rush Limbaugh, it would not waste another megahertz of radio bandwidth on conservative banter.

Rush Limbaugh exists because millions listen to him. Randi Rhodes hardly exists because hardly anyone listens to her, relatively speaking.